Chances are you've heard the tip that it's never a good idea to swamp your ex with communication just after a breakup. A bit of time and space is always recommended regardless of whether or not you want to get your ex back eventually, but there does come a time in your plan for getting him or her back where you're going to have to make contact again...but how? That's what I'm here to help you with!
Re-establishing contact with an ex should only be done after you've both had some time and space away from each other, and you used that isolation from your ex to do some real work on getting your things straight. Even once that's all good and you're ready to contact your ex again, you need to go about it properly.
A "heavy" contact full of emotions and talk about getting back together is a bad idea at this stage. You're probably still hurting from the breakup, and likely so too is your ex...and the first impulse you may give your ex by hammering him or her with this sort of talk is panic or anxiety. You could very well cause yourself to lose your ex for good!
For this reason, getting back in touch with your ex should be a "light" contact without any overwhelming "relationship talk." Your first communication should be an ice-breaker, not a relationship-fixer. It's a slow process to rebuild a relationship, and you need to accept that and take it easy. The most recommended avenues of a contact re-initiation are a brief email, text message, or phone call. Meeting in person is usually a bit too forward for such a fragile situation.
Remember that you don't want to scare your ex away with "touchy-feely talk," so keep it friendly. Ask how they've been doing, and basically make your presence and willingness to associate with them known. You're rebuilding from the ground up, starting at friendship and working from there. Pushing the gas too fast...well, I think I've made it clear what that could do.
If all goes well with the first contact, the way is open to keep going on a gradual incline. Eventually the time should come when you're spending time together again, and that's where you can shine as a new and improved you. Once you get the door open, it's up to you how you want to walk through it.
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